2009 Team Photo

PETER HOLLIBONE (THE EARL OF WOMBATSHIRE)

HAVING MISSED THE 2009 SIXES, THE EARL IS BACK TO LEAD HIS WOMBATS THROUGH THE RIGORS OF PATPONG AND THE BARS OF CHIANG MAI.  THE EARL’S TEA WILL REMAIN IN HIGH DEMAND.

KEN DASHWOOD (WOMBATSHIRE CHIEF CONSTABLE)

WE WELCOME DASHER BACK TO FULL FITNESS, HAVING RETURNED FROM CLOSE EXAMINATION OF THE WINERIES OF TASMANIA AND SAMPLING THEIR PRODUCE.  DASHER SHOULD BE A LEADING CONTENDER FOR THE WOMBATS RED WINE CONSUMPTION COMPETITION.

NEVILLE CLEARSON (POET LAUREATE)

NIFTUS ERECTUS HAS BEEN AT REGULAR ELBOW BENDING PRACTICE IN ORDER TO IMPROVE HIS BOWLING TECHNIQUE.  ALL WILL BE REVEALED IN THE OLD TIMERS MATCHES.

ALAN TASKER (FIGARO)

ALAN REMAINS AS COURT JESTER TO THE KINGDOM OF BULLENGAROOK AND OFFICIAL HEAVY ROLLER TO THE PITCH.  RESTING ON HIS LAURELS FROM A BRILLIANT WOMBAT CRICKETING CAREER AND HIS CREATIVE ABILITY WITH HIS TRUSTY DISPOSABLE GILLETTE RAZOR, ALAN WILL BE A FORCE TO BE RECKONED WITH IN THE FOXY LADY BAR.

JOHN CONGLETON (ARCHBISHOP OF BULLENGAROOK)

THE ARCHBISHOP IS READY TO PERFORM MARRIAGES, BAPTISMS, DIVORCES, BLESSINGS OF UNIONS (ALL TYPES) AND WILL CONDUCT CONFESSIONS, AS WELL AS POURING THE HEALING BALM OF CONSOLATION UPON WOMBATS WHO MAY HAVE IMBIBED TOO MUCH.

PETER NITSCHKE (WOOLLEY)

NOW A CONFIRMED WOMBAT OF THE HIGHEST ORDER, THE GREENOCK TAVERNER’S REPUTATION HAS GONE WELL BEFORE HIM IN THE BARS OF CHIANG MAI.  KNOWN TO BE MASTER OF THE ‘HARD ROCK’ WOMBAT CREW.

TERRY KERSEY (WOMBAT AMBASSADOR TO THE SUNSHINE STATE)

A WORTHY WOMBAT EXPONENT WITH BAT AND BALL.  A MOST IMPORTANT WOMBAT WHO KEEPS ERIC LITTLE IN CHECK.  A DEMANDING TASK IN ITSELF.  TERRY WILL AGAIN BE ASSISTED BY HIS WIFE HEATHER.

JIM CAMERON (JERSEY JIM)

JIM PROVED TO BE A WORTHY WOMBAT IN 2009, LIVING UP TO WOMBAT PERFORMANCE STANDARDS ON AND OFF THE FIELD.  WE LOOK TO JIM TO RAISE THE STANDARD THIS YEAR, PARTICULARLY IN THE SPOTLIGHT, FOXY LADY, ET AL.

BODIE GALVIN (BUSHY)

BODIE PROVED HIS WOMBAT CREDENTIALS LAST YEAR, AND IS PRACTICING TO IMPROVE FOR 2010.  SEEN AT THE MOVIES WATCHING ‘VALENTINE’S DAY’ WITH FOUR ATTRACTIVE FEMALES, WE WILL NEED TO KEEP BODIE AWAY FROM THE SPOTLIGHT OR ALL THE STAFF WILL BE GONE!

JUSTIN KERSEY

A WELL TRAVELLED YOUNG CRICKETER WITH INTERNATIONAL EXPERIENCE IN ALL THINGS WOMBAT.  AN INTERROGATION MAY BE NECESSARY AT THE WOMBATS AGM.

STEVE DOHERTY (WOMBAT FITNESS DIRECTOR)

OFFICIAL FITNESS TRAINER FOR THE WOMBATS.  A VERY DIFFICULT AND EXACTING TASK.  EXPECTED TO INVITE ALL WOMBATS TO JOIN IN HIS EARLY MORNING RUN, BUT WILL ONLY BE SUCCESSFUL IF HE STARTS AT FOXY LADY TO SHOW THE WOMBATS THE WAY HOME.

TRENT CONWELL (MINISTER OF TRANSPORT)

OFFICIAL PILOT TO THE KING, COVERING ALL FORMS OF TRANSPORT, AIRCRAFT, TUK TUKS AND MOTOR SCOOTERS.  TRENT IS A SECOND OFFICER ON QANTAS 747 AIRCRAFT AND SHOULD BE ABLE TO ARRANGE DATES WITH FEMALE CABIN CREW FOR ELIGIBLE WOMBATS (THOSE UNDER 75 YEARS OF AGE!)

WILLIAM GIBBS

A PROVEN WOMBAT WITH BRILLIANT BATTING AND BOWLING ABILITIES IN THE OLD TIMERS. GAMES.  WILLIAM WILL AGAIN GRACE THE FIELD IN HIS CHARISMATIC WAY AND CHARM THE CAMP FOLLOWING ENTOURAGE.

JOHN BELL (LAIRD OF LAKESIDE)

JOHN IS CERTAINLY OF OFFICIAL PEERAGE IN THE KINGDOM OF BULLENGAROOK.  HE IS NOW A KNIGHT COMMANDER OF THE ORDER OF THE LEAPING WOMBAT, AND HE WILL BE SEEN CHEERING THE WOMBATS ON AND CONDUCTING REGULAR TASTINGS OF THE EARL’S TEA.

PAUL MURPHY (THE WELSH WOMBAT)

MURPH WILL AGAIN JOIN THE WOMBAT TROUPE THIS YEAR.  HE WILL BE SEEN PERFORMING TRICKS AT THE HARD ROCK CAFÉ AND CONDUCTING QUIZ SESSIONS WITH WILLING FEMALE PARTICIPANTS AT THE GALARE. PRELIMINARY SESSIONS WILL BE HELD AT THE SPOTLIGHT.

IAN CHIPPENDALE (MINISTER OF HEALTH AND FOREIGN AFFAIRS)

ANOTHER WELCOME APPEARANCE FROM OUR MINISTER FOR HEALTH AND FOREIGN AFFAIRS, ALWAYS READY TO ADMINISTER PAINKILLERS, USUALLY ALCOHOLIC IN NATURE, AND WILL DISPENSE ADVICE TO ALL WOMBATS WILLING TO LISTEN.  CHIPS ALSO HAS THE VERY DIFFICULT TASK OF ACTING AS NURSEMAID TO THE KING AND ACCOMPANYING HIM ON THE ROYAL NIGHTLY VISITS TO THE CHIANG MAI DENS OF INIQUITY.

GRAEME HARRY (THE BAG MAN)

WORTH REPEATING THE 2002 NOTES WHICH REMAIN RELEVANT. 

GRAEME PROMISES NOT TO FALL OUT OF BED AGAIN WHILE HAVING STRANGE DREAMS ABOUT STUFFING WOMBATS INTO SKY TRAINS.  HE IS WORKING ON A SHORT LIST OF CANDIDATES FOR MAID OF THE BEDCHAMBER, AND IS CONDUCTING PRELIMINARY INTERVIEWS AT THE CROWN ROYAL IMMEDIATELY ON ARRIVAL IN BANGKOK.  ALL CANDIDATES WILL BE GIVEN A CLOSE EXAMINATION AND AN APPROPRIATE REHEARSAL.

ALAN HOBBS (THE KING OF BULLENGAROOK)

HIS ROYAL HIGHNESS WILL BE GRACING US WITH A LONG AWAITED VISIT TO ENSURE THAT ALL WOMBATS WILL RISE TO ALL OCCASIONS, DON THEIR ARMOUR OR WHATEVER OTHER FORMS OF PROTECTION ARE REQUIRED, AND CONDUCT THEMSELVES WELL ON THE FIELD OF ENDEAVOUR.  THE KING IS EXPECTED TO PROVIDE THE EARL AND THE MINISTER OF HEALTH WITH AN UNENDING SUPPLY OF GIN AND TONIC AS A DESERVED REWARD FOR THEIR CONSTANT ATTENTION TO HIS DEMANDS.

SCOTT MILLARD (RIGHT HAND BATSMAN, LEFT ARM BOWLER, WICKET KEEPER)

SCOTT IS AS CUNNING AS GLEN MCGRATH WITH THE BAT, AS CRAFTY AS JUSTIN LANGER WITH THE BALL, AND AS EXCITING IN THE FIELD AS PHIL TUFFNIL.  IF YOU HAVE A CHOICE WATCHING HIM PERFORM ON THE FIELD, OR WATCHING GRASS GROW, CHOOSE THE LATTER.

JASON LOCK (LEFT HAND BATSMAN, LEFT ARM BOWLER)

SOME HAVE SAID THAT JASON IS A SPITTING IMAGE OF LANCE KLUSSNER WHILE AT THE CREASE BUT BETTER.  WITH BALL IN HAND HIS LATE SWING AND PRECISE ACCURACY HAS BEEN COMPARED WITH WASIM AKRAM.  KEEP YOUR EYE ON THIS EXCITEMENT MACHINE, HE IS ONE TO WATCH.

BROOK GRUMONT (RIGHT HAND BAT, RIGHT ARM BOWLER)

GAZELLE-LIKE FIELDER WITH AN ARM LIKE JELLY.  WITH BAT IN HAND HE IS KNOWN AS THE SINGLES CRAFTSMAN.  WITH BALL IN HAND HITTING THE PITCH IS BROOK’S MAIN AND ONLY GOAL.  DON’T BE FOOLED BY BROOK’S SLOW APPROACH TO SIXES CRICKET, HE WILL STILL BE A CROWD FAVOURITE, ESPECIALLY WITH THE LADY BOYS.

GARRY GOODALL (RIGHT HAND BAT, RIGHT ARM BOWLER)

AWESOME.  EXPECTED TO BE A LEADING LIGHT AT WOMBAT NIGHT TRAINING RUNS.