2008 Team Photo

Jez (Jellamee) Coulbeck (Tour No. 14). An awesome display of commitment brings Jes to his 14th consecutive Chiang Mai tour (at the expense of his 13th wedding anniversary). This Darjeeling stalwart, notorious for his tour antics, will again be keen to guide the touring party through another successful tournament both on and off the field. For an accurate indication of the depth of the current ‘financial crisis’, those in the know are waiting pensively to see whether Jes has been able to secure his sponsorship deal with one, Mr. Daniels for 2009. Regardless, we hear that Jes has been tending his body hair for another epic ‘Flaming Saddle Bags’. Not to be missed!!      

George Appleton (Tour No. 7). Having relinquished his position as Skipper of DCC earlier this year, George will be taking up his self titled position as ‘Consultant to the Captain’, enabling him to concentrate on his cricket for the first time in many years. His calm, reassuringly supportive demeanor will no doubt be missed by this year’s rookies, however George is sure to let his bat do the talking in this, his seventh Chiang Mai tour. (Opposition sides may approach George directly for consultancy services.)

Stuart ‘Two Tubes' Hardie (Tour No. 8). Cigar toting, brandy swilling, 5:95 condition at 8am, gives a heavy boost from previous nights dealings and totally bemuses onlookers. His inspiring support will no doubt boost all players, or keep players in their seats wanting more. Word has it that the Chiang Mai ladies are queuing up for his return as a regular visitor to Chiang Mai during the off season. Will no doubt lend his “expertise” to the Virgins this year? As long as he can keep his Eating tube, Drinking tube and Viagra tube separated.

Greg ‘It's all about the kids' Moses (Tour No.5). Having followed up his 2007 - Player of the Tournament award with an equally sublime performance in last years competition, Greg has been handed the reigns of the 2009 Darjeeling squad. Greg’s commitment to the kids is legendary, and you can bet your bottom dollar he’ll have them in mind every time he ‘strides’ to the middle. We hope Greg’s on the field antics will match those off the field, as those who know him, know how strongly he feels about contributing to the Chiang Mai economy over the period of the tournament.  

Chris ‘The Domminator' Dommett (Tour No. 5). The ‘Domminator’ returns this year, leaner and meaner than ever before. Having taken the first step in making an honest woman of the DCC Social Secretary, as well as entering the Dubai celebrity scene  (with his face for radio) in ‘08, Chris has entered a new era where his performance will come under more scrutiny than ever before. A formidable all-rounder with both bat and gloves, Chris will be keen to show that silver, is indeed the new black. With a large component of tour virgins this year, Chris will again endeavor to maintain a certain amount of decorum within the ranks…good luck Chris!!  

Richard Cox Snr (Tour No. 4). Having narrowly missed out on “Turd of the Tour” last year (due to a last minute cancellation of the award???), enigmatic Richard will be keen to up his game on this year’s tour. Nobody is immune to Richard’s legendary sledging which can be heard from every corner of the ground, however his passion should not be mistaken for arrogant diatribe! As DCC’s no.1 fan, Coxy will undoubtedly be shouting his words of encouragement throughout the tournament. As usual, Richard’s services will be available for any stand-in requirements for any team!

John Deuten (Tour No. 3). Some say he discovered oil in the Middle East. Some say he gave birth to Ian Botham. Some say that his skin has the texture of a dolphin’s, and where ever you are in the world, if you tune your radio to 88.4, you can actually hear his thoughts. All we know is he’s called the ‘Chairman’.  The ‘Chairman’ returns to Chaing Mai once again; silently willing the Darjeeling lads on to bigger and better things, through a haze of Monte Cristo smoke.

Rudi Bisschoff (Tour No. 3), Rudi’s return to Chiang Mai in 2008 was nothing short of spectacular! When not hitting 6’s or taking opposition’s ‘f***ing heads off’ on the field, Rudi was fighting off the ‘sex-pest’ off the field. Rudi’s claims of having bowled none other than Chris Cairns in 2008 are yet to be confirmed, as it remains unclear if it was simply due to his laughing so hard at Rudi’s 65mph chin music. Unfortunately nobody can be sure whether it’s love or cricket which brings Rudi back to Chiang Mai in 2009.  

Harry ‘The sex-pest' Maltby (Tour No. 2). Harry returns to Chiang Mai this year as a doting Father and husband! While this should reflect in his cricket, Harry tends to take more interest in supplying his team mates with magic water during matches. If however Harry comes good, we’re sure to see the ball go a long way. With his new responsibilities, we’re sure Harry will be assisting Chris in maintaining the Club’s dignity, when not discussing team tactics with Greg in his room after dark!

Matt Trehy (Tour No. 2). Matt has returned to this year’s tournament almost half the man he was before. Whether the weight loss can be attributed to something picked up at  last year’s tour (???) or all the time he’s spent bowling in the nets since then, we’re not sure! What we do know is that Matt will be keen to redeem himself for last year’s infamous 40 run over. Whether with the bat or ball, Matt will be out to do some damage when not contributing to the local employment rate.

Steve Blandford (Virgin Tour). Virgin tourist this year, will be a welcome site to all ladies “fresh meat”. A lefty who will want to show his metal this year by hitting sixes aplenty from the word go. Solid bat in the longer version of the game and accurate lefty bowler. Been chosen due to his strong ability not to see in the dark, Question is will he see the “girly boys”.

Eugene Terre'Blanche (Virgin Tour). With the insurgent of Tour Virgins, Eugene supplies a much needed balance to the batting and bowling attack. Left hander for both, Eugene would be wanting to show how potent he is. Will no doubt take to all the sites, golf, bars, etc and leave a lasting impression in many ways. Has the knack to dose off  when wasted and on a chair.

James McSweeney (Virgin Tour). Another Virgin for Darjeeling. The newly married James will be up for all the exploits of Chiang Mai and that the sixes offer to limits. Good all-rounder, with potential to leave bowlers irritated by his clean play. Batsmen will find him hard to get away. If he can smash a cricket ball as far as a golf ball, and drink as per his reputation, anything is possible.

James Grisdale (Virgin Tour). Beware Chaing Mai! The inclusion of James will send shivers down the spines of all those that know him; and will continue to do so to all those that didn’t, for a long, long time to come. Whether lumbering, hung-over down the wicket with the ball in hand, wielding the willow, or throwing his considerable weight around, James will be keeping opponents and tour minders busier than a one armed bricklayer in Baghdad.

Blake ‘Windy’ Miller (Virgin Tour). Since being in exile, this young Zimbo has been wandering lost and aimlessly, until finally finding solace in the welcoming arms of Darjeeling. Having taken the poor lad in, we look forward to seeing if Blake is able to ‘walk the walk’. He has not failed to impress in the nets thus far, and promises to be one to watch in this year’s tournament. Unfortunately his inability to deal with the obvious ramifications of over-indulgence, just may prove to be his unraveling. (That’s if he makes it past passport control with that dodgy passport of course.)