Team at 2002 Sixes

Last year' all-round performances will be hard to beat, but with a few new faces this year' tourists will certainly have a go. Returnees include Scott "Waffle" Brown and Mike ‘The Greek Shipping Magnate’ Tsesmelis. Waffle is expected to continue to talk nonsense and perform impromptu ‘Haka'’, whilst GSM will be looking to further his rapport with the daughters of Chiang Mai officials. Gary "Bunny" Davies will also be making the journey up from Singapore as Tour Manager, and Paul "Ooh" Howard, in the middle of a year-long sabbatical on a beach, is rumoured to be readying his long-handled weapon for action.

Chiang Mai virgins are likely to include Gary Chatfield, Prakash Wakankar, Peter Bullard and Martin Hill, all of whom have played cricket before, so at the time of writing the search was on for someone to fill the Tour Clown position previously held by Thomas "Da Tank" Murdoch and Simon "Klaus" Harper.