Overseas Umpires:
Peter Gray: Dear Old Uncle Fester is back again. He
says he's returned because he enjoyed the umpiring duties, but that is
highly suspect; he really wishes to continue his relationship with the
Earl of Wombatshire as "Glorious Keeper of the Earl's Golden Nectar",
a position he obtained by base fawning at the feet of His Mightiness.
A breathalyser test has been set up in the Umpires lair to check Festers
(and that of others, I might add) alcohol rating!!
Paul Jones: Hagar Horribilis will be temporarily forsaking
the taverns of Wrexham again for the high (and very low) spots of Chiangmai
try the beer bars near the Night Market. Annually Hagar feels it incumbent
upon himself to drink more and sleep less than other mortals, but he's
always on time for his umpiring duties and has been an ever present adjudicator
for many happy years.
Jim Middleton: Beeg Jeem, another former top cricketer
turned Digital Raiser, is Chairman of the Hong Kong A.C.U. & S. and
a dynamic Hong Kong businessman He's here again this time to check that
Peter Dawson has been carefully tending his piece of plastic grass in
the corner of some foreign field, assiduously watering and cutting it
on a weekly basis, just as Jim told him to! His also been spending time
this year in South Africa, where he's been laying the plastic pitches
all over the High Veldt.
Garry Snashall: Our W.A. representative, Garry the Snash,
is back again with us and has promised to be at his immaculate best all
the tournament, to carry Mike Mahers kit every day and to prop up the
Sugar Shack bar for as long as Auy and Benny will let him.
Herb Whitlock: Herb first thrust himself on the Chiangmai
cricketing community six years ago and after wrestling a reluctant lamp
stand at the Galare Guesthouse during the early hours (and losing, incidentally)
he returned to U.K. in 1998 and has since been saving his dole money and
has now made good his good his threat to come back to Chiangmai annually
for another tussle with the dastardly lamp shade and a daily sauna under
the Thai sunshine at the Sixes.
Martin Flynn: No longer a newcomer to the tournament
but still one who allowed himself to be suckered into coming by the sugary
tongue of one Mike Maher, Martin knows now what hes let himself in for
in Northern Thailand. He seemed to enjoy the umpiring duties last April,
but he should still be watchful for his recalcitrant son Adam, who can
be seen lurking under the Gymkhana, especially when the Old Man's umpiring!!
Geoff Gooch: The Sheriff of Nottingham made his debut
last year and liked it so much he decided to have a hip operation in the
meantime so that his mate Hagar doesn't have to carry him up two flights
of stairs at the Galare!. All naughty Wombats should be on their best
behaviour as the Sheriff will be watching!!!
Mike Burns: Burnsy is a Waratah spy sent in by the Crunch
to ensure that the Newcastle side only have afternoon matches, that they
only have to bowl four overs but bat for six, and get free booze from
the Pommie umps.
Ness Khan: At the time of writing, it would seem that
this amiable Kiwi is coming back for more. He was unable to make it last
year, but is hoping to be back in full flow this time. His one regret
is that his old mate Khun Stick will not be here to be joshed along, but
there will be others!
K.T. Francis: This year, we are honoured to welcome
Mr. K.T. Francis, a
well-known International umpire from Sri Lanka. He recently ran an Umpires'
course in Hong Kong as part of the Asian Cricket programme and fell under
the gentle spell of Jim Middleton's sweet tongue. Jim told him what a
thrill he'd have in Chiangmai with Hagar, Fester, Snash etc. and that
he
would personally introduce him to the Earl of Wombat! K.T. weakened and
it
will be our pleasure to have him with us. Spotlight Bar here we come!
Local Umpires:
David Dufall: One would have thought that twice was
enough, but dear old David, has popped back up to Chiangmai to forget
all about life in the fast lane down in Bangkok and to come and join us
in the Umpires lair once again.
Tony Gough: As organiser of this assorted crew, he takes
absolutely no responsibility for the successes and failures of his men.
Far more at home nowadays in Phuket, accompanied by an ever chilly bottle
of Carlsberg, than on Jim's hallowed turf, he nevertheless loves his annual
jaunt up to Chiangmai.
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